|Vince partying shirtless with shirtless Bubba and roadies|
Yesterday, via Blackberry, Vince Young tweeted this:
"@KingJames bother @KingJames can't wait to we win so we can laugh n these hater faces. But they forget we r winning off the field"
VY added: "@KingJames and off court"
I'm going to break down every word of this fucking statement. But first let me educate y'all to a little history of my deep rooted hate for this moron. It started with Roy Williams being a diva WR since day one. I couldn't stand Williams' hype and all that shit, because unlike you, I know better when it comes to Longhorn players; they're all pampered premadonnas. It was that UT team, those players on that team, and the AWFUL fucking "fans" of that team, that eventually culminated in a blinding hate for Vince Young. His fans…my god. To this day, I don't even think Tebow fans were as bad as VY's minions. None of them ever listened to me when I was 15 fucking years old telling them that VY's game would never translate to the NFL. I knew that and said it about a thousand times a day. No one listened. In fact, not only did stupid ass VY supporters disagree and argue with me, but would act as if I was speaking some kind of heresy. Seriously, family and friends would get legitimately pissed at me for telling them that VY was a burnt orange cunt-stain.
|Shit is about to get weird|
It Took a Tweet:
Vince: in what way are you winning? Your life has been an absolute embarrassment since old man Kerry Collins superseded you as a starter and led the Titans to 13 wins. How are you in ANY way relatable to LeBron? You never made it to a Superbowl (never will, not as a starter) and you've never earned a prowl appearance. Hell…you weren't even the first overall pick of your draft class (OR THE SECOND). Next, how are you "winning off the field"? Have you signed a new contract or something? We all know your ass doesn't have any money left. Jobless college students have more income coming from their nonexistent employers than Vince has left in the bank. Also, you use a Blackberry? Faggot.
Vince spelled "brother" as "bother" when addressing his superior, Lebron. Then follows it up with "cant wait to we win", as if I forgot him accepting the national championship trophy. Even if Vince ever did win literally ANYTHING again, if he laughed in THIS hater's face, I would laugh right back. Vince sounds like a clown when he talks. AWLL DA WAY T' TEXIS, BAYYYBAY! Finally, the cherry on top of the SHIT-pie that is Vince, was him sending an additional tweet saying "and off court". This is clearly Vince trying to outsmart us. Vince is a bonafide retard, and he attempts to clarify the most obvious thing ever to an equally retarded athlete. Turns out even when VY is just trying to come off a little less stupid, he ended up reaffirming his idiocy. Also, VYs twitter avatar is him all burnt orange'd out and UT'd up...let it go, bitch. It was a long time ago for you. Not in reality, but bro, you have taken a long fall to the bottom. You're as shitty a pro as you are because you're still holding onto the period in your life when you were still worth a shit. Times have changed, Vince.
Further Dissection of a Bitchmade:
Vince graduated from Madison High School in Houston. Fortunately, my good friend is dating a girl that graduated from there. You know what that school has framed in the cafeteria as if it was some monument? A $1000 check from VY, made out to the school. A thousand dollars. That was cash from his rookie contract($58mil) in which he made almost $40 million in guaranteed money, and he only donated $1000 to the school that made sure he stayed on the football field? I hope VY's dick is ripped off by Pillowpants the next time he sticks it in one of the Hellraisers' asses.
|Yeah, my nigga...yeah.|
I won't necessarily spend too much time capping on VY for his Wonderlic score (6), but I will say this: I took that test in an experiment for a marketing class. It's not easy, but you basically get 6 points for writing your name on it. I'm sure even he could write in his name, R-A-D-I-O.
Vince's entire NFL career has been a failure of David Carr-like proportions (YEAH I SAID IT). At least David is under contract with a team, and as unjustifiable as it is, will be competing for a starting position in San Francisco. He's FAR from serviceable, but it says something that he's on a team while VY is tweeting about "winning". Both have a career completion percentage of 57.9%. Vince has 42 TD passes to 42 INTs. Carr has 65 TDs to 71 INTs. David Carr has 1331 career yards rushing (nearly ALL of it coming from his time in Houston); Vince has 1380 career rushing yards. Scrambling and rushing was the ONE thing VY had going for him! Factor in that David Carr played behind arguably history's worst offensive lines, and I'd say he has been the more successful NFL quarterback BY FAR.
Not only would I throw the horns down in Vince's ugly face, but I would bend him over, and give him the horns down, Shocker-style. One horn in his pussy, and one in his loosened butthole.
Closing Thoughts, Final Serving:
Before you fucking people even think of responding, remember this: I don't care if VY ran in the game-winning touchdown for a national championship. He is the epitome of immaturity, and therefore any wins he accounted for for a corrupt university/athletic department are null in my eyes. He was an UNBELIEVABLE college QB, he was pretty much one the top 5 players I've ever seen. Does that make him less of a bitch? No. If being GOD at sports can't help LeBron, then Vince has NO chance. And that's my point entirely: Where does VY get off comparing himself to arguably the world's most recognizable athlete? If LeBron showed up in China, he'll be welcomed by literally BILLIONS of adoring fans. If VY got off the same plane, the Chinese would declare war against America. Vince is only lowering the public's perception of him by trying to cling onto the world's most hated athlete. VY, you're not a superstar…you're not on the same plane as LeBron…even Chris Bosh is more respected and better paid than you. Don't ever forget this, Vince: you are an utter failure. Fucking up when you're broke and young is one thing, fucking up when you're a professional athlete with millions of dollars is just unacceptable to me.
By the way, what team is Vince playing for next season? What about Mario Williams?
Mmmm…That's what the fuck I thought.